Are You Addicted To Love?
Hear me out, fam.
We all know that relationships are hard. I know it more than a lot of people. Here’s why- I’ve been addicted to love. I think that we all have been at one point or another but when I say “addicted to love,” I’m not talking about the kind of love that we really should be chasing. I’m talking about romanticizing another person for what it is that they can offer you. Or what they once offered you but do not offer you anymore. This chasing of a floating feeling is unauthentic and will continue to leave you unsatisfied again and again.
This happens with friends, love interests, family members and even with yourself. There are seasons when you offer something valuable to yourself that is not sustainable and when you no longer offer it to yourself because you organically changed, then you might find yourself resenting where you are now instead of meeting yourself where you are. It can be the same with a lover or friend. That beautiful beginning to a relationship where you and someone else are constantly giving to one another can be a wonderful season to live out but at one point or another, real life is going to kick in. At some point that person is going to settle back into what and who they really are.
Some of you really need to hear this. If the real version of them isn’t good enough for you, maybe you were only chasing what they offered you and not chasing who they are. It is an easy mistake to make. That new relationship love feels good and comfortable and so we have a tendency to start to view people through that lease. This makes it very difficult to have true grace. The kind of grace that it takes to truly love a person. To truly accept a person for their flaws and their successes. To love someone where they are at and not for where they have been.
Listen, life is hard. Life is messy. It’s a beautiful thing when someone pours into you and you pour into someone else but it’s important to recognize that we are just human. Fallible humans trying our very best to reach up and into the light of a better future.
Think through your life and ask yourself what is the realest form of love that you have ever felt? Maybe it was from a parent, a friend, or romantic partner. Maybe it was from a teacher or mentor, or even a stranger. I bet you anything that something in you latched onto it and made a lasting impression because someone met you where you were at and loved you through it.
It’s a good thing to chase love. Ask yourself this though - what kind of love are you chasing? Maybe it is rehab time.
it all starts with you.