Be a Mirror
Until you really want to grow, it's not going to happen unless you want to do it.
So let me start off by painting a picture for y'all really quickly. Imagine you're walking with a friend on a dangerous trail, and you see them start to walk towards a cliff. What are you going to say to them before they fall off of the cliff? "Stop," right? Or are you not going to say anything? What if it was someone you didn't like - "hate" is a strong word so let's stick with "don't like" - were about to walk off that same cliff? You would probably say stop to them too, right? You don't want that kind of blood on your hands. You probably want to do the right thing even if you don't like them, but especially if you do. Common sense, right? Sometimes when we're walking the wrong path we have trouble seeing it ourselves and we need our friends to be there for us and tell us when we're walking off of a cliff. If you're a friend and you see that going on - it's up to you. This all starts with you. Sometimes it's not about what you tell them because sometimes they can't hear you. Sometimes it's about being there for them, or it's about being a good example as a friend. How are you living? What kind of mirror are you being for your friends and those around you?
Let me tell you something -- if you are a parent, you are a leader. This kid needs you in their life. For real. If you can provide for them, that is great, but if you aren't providing t-i-m-e to them, no amount of money is going to make you a good parent. The first thing I said to my son when he was born was this: "I don't want you to grow up to be like me." When I said this to him, it hurt me to my core, but here's the situation -- it all starts with me. I want to break the cycle. I don't want my kid to grow up with the "family curses" that I've had to inherit. I want to be the right example for my kid. That's the thing. These problems we feel doomed to pass on lie in our hands. We can choose to put something better out into the world and be a better mirror to our kids.
Here's another thing: It's not just about what you say. You may be talking the right way and saying all the right things, but if you're not living it out, you will be leading your kids down the wrong path. They are watching you -- I promise that. They are watching everything that you do because some part of them will follow what you do. This goes for friends and other family members as well.
What you do will ripple out to the people around you. So, what kind of example are you going to be? How are you going to change your life in order to help yourself and the people around you?
It all starts with you.