This is a message for you to go harder for yourself. Take ownership of your life and have heart, have discipline, make the changes that you need to make, be committed, and be consistent. And have the courage to call a different play. Have the courage to adjust, and to do what’s not popular, have the courage to engage. You have to give your life what it needs, only you can do it.
For how you deal with grief in your life, I’m telling you there is a key and it’s this - Active gratitude. I know it’s easier said than done but listen to me. One of the hardest things in this life is losing someone you love. And I don’t like to say “lose,” because really you gain. You gain the beauty that comes with the depth and pain of that event. It’s going to take time to heal and you have to give yourself that grace. Allow yourself the time that it takes to get through the grief, while you do your best to practice active gratefulness. A simple perspective shift can truly help your life.
For those dealing with grief or feeling like you can’t go on, I want to tell you that the person you lost has run their race. They have gained eternal life. My mom’s not here anymore and it’s so much more beautiful because I get glimpses of my mom all the time. Even though I want to have her here in the physical form, and hug and kiss her, I’m grateful for the glimpses. The personal moments that I get to share with the eternal form of my mother.
Regret is poison to your soul and gratitude is medicine to your soul. When it comes to dealing with losing loved ones, I have had so many times that I look back and say “I wish I had done more, or fought more. I wish I would have said more,” and I get stuck in the “I wish Syndrome.” I need to tell you that does nothing for your life. You cannot change a past, it’s already been written. So now when I catch myself saying “man I wish I would have,” I stop myself and say “ man, I’m glad I got to.” This will help your life as you deal with their transition.
The last thing that I want to leave you with is this- would you want your death to be the reason that someone gave up on themselves? Would you want your passing to contribute to the downfall of someone else? Of course not. You have a responsibility to your loved one to run your race, and don’t quit because they have finished theirs.
It all starts with you.
