Control Your Worth
Many of us don't know how to control how we value ourselves and our own worth because we were not told how important that is when we were younger. Many of us grew up believing that we were somehow inherently selfish. As a consequence, we believed that taking care of ourselves was bad. We believed that believing in ourselves was bad. We even started to believe that thinking we had worth was selfish. So we avoided knowing our own worth and as a consequence of that we let whatever was in front of us control our worth. I've said this before and I will say it again -- we allow our experiences to become our identity.
Sometimes we allow our significant others to fill that role. We let the way they feel about us, how much we think they love us, or how much attention they give us determine our worth. Sometimes we allow the internet to determine and control our worth. We tell ourselves that if we were more valuable then we would have more followers. We believe when we do not get enough likes on a post that there is something wrong with us or maybe that we have done something wrong. Sometimes some of us have bad parents and we allow them to determine our worth no matter how badly they have treated us in the past. If our parents tell us we messed up and we should have done something better then we believe it.
We have got to stop relying on the external to determine our worth. We are all giving everything else in the world power except ourselves. If we could just realize that we are the ones giving the power away then we might realize that we are the ones who originally hold the power, and maybe just maybe we could keep it this time instead of giving it away.
Next, you have got to realize that it is not selfish to believe that you have worth. It can actually help you to be more selfless in life. If you believe that you don't have anything to offer then why would you help anyone? You have got to believe in yourself and what you have to offer others in order to be kind and caring to others in the first place. The kindness that comes from comfort in oneself is going to be so much better than the kindness that you do in order to gain approval from others. That kindness is selfish and hollow.
Lastly, we have got to stop comparing. We always compare ourselves to the people around us who have things going better at the moment. Maybe you look at someone who has more followers than you and believe that you are less valuable than them because of that. We look at someone who is more in shape and assume that they have more worth because of their body. None of this is true. The only person we should be comparing ourselves to is ourselves. How can I be better than I was yesterday? That's it. If we can focus inward and find our value on the inside, and quit comparing ourselves to others, then we can begin to get back on track, and we can begin to control our worth.
It all starts with you.