It's time for you to work on you.
We all walk around everyday with voids in our lives. All too often we allow these voids to drive us - to control us. We hate the feeling these voids give us. We hate feeling incomplete so we settle with the people we allow in our lives. We settle with the job we decide to take, or the content we decide to post on social media. We do this because we think that person, that job, or those likes will fill those voids.
The problem here is that we become dependent on others in order for us to be happy. We allow other people to determine our worth. Why? Because settling is easier than being alone or feeling alone, or holding out for that right opportunity. We become scared of ourselves over time because we never learn to be alone with ourselves - to be alone with our voids.
If you aren't comfortable with yourself you certainly shouldn't be getting in a relationship. Your voids aren't going away, but masking them and hiding in another person isn't the answer. You've got to learn to be comfortable with yourself and the voids you feel. Life isn't supposed to be happy-go-lucky twenty four hours a day and seven days a week. Life is hard, and learning to be alone and count on yourself in the midst of the heat, tension, and heartbreak is a necessary skill for anyone to remain healthy.
Another issue that you'll find if you keep on the path of depending on others is that people will use you. When you're just looking to fill a void and you're willing to compromise and settle to do so, some people will smell that weakness out and prey on that. In the beginning, they'll treat you the way you've wanted to be treated for so long. They'll pay attention to what you mention you hated so much about the last person you let close to you. If you say they didn't call you enough, they'll call every night. If you mention how they didn't touch you enough, this new person will be as physical as you want. But only in the beginning! First impressions stick in your mind. So when their attitude starts to slip and they begin to be flighty, inconsiderate, or inconsistent you won't attribute this to their character, because you've decided who they are based off of who they pretended to be at first. You'll make constant excuses to yourself because you feel at your core that they complete you, but they shouldn't. Nobody should complete you. You should complete you. If you don't feel whole, or independent then you should work on being with yourself - not someone else. If you allow someone to complete you then you'll be lost seemingly beyond repair when they're gone.
To sum up, it's important to be careful and cautious with you allow into your life. You wouldn't just let anyone off the street into your house, so don't do that with your life. You're important and valuable and so is your time. Start acting like it.
It all starts with you.
