Today I am going to talk to you guys about something I really struggle with. I am just going to be real with you guys about this. I do not think I am the only one, but forgiveness can really be a burden for me sometimes. Let’s just be honest here, a lot of the time forgiveness is hard. I get so many emails from people saying “Trent, this person hurt me, this person betrayed my trust, this person ruined my life and I genuinely just do not know how to have forgiveness for them in my life.” I hear that. I know that a lot of times forgiveness is tough for me, so I can really feel it when I get an email like that. So today I want to go into some tips that have helped me in the past. Now do not get me wrong, I am not going to pretend like this is the list that will guarantee a cure to the problem of forgiveness, but I will share what I have done in the past when I have struggled with forgiveness. This is going to be the advice that even I have to go back to over and over again, because sometimes I still struggle with forgiveness. It is just not easy sometimes when you feel like you have been so badly betrayed that you could never reestablish trust or structure in that relationship.
One thing that took me several years to learn and something that I think a lot of people have yet to learn because I see this all around being told the wrong way, but first thing is first: Forgiveness does not mean that you are weak. I think a lot of people believe that to be someone who stands up for themselves means to be someone who never lets their guard down and never apologizes and certainly never forgives when you were badly wronged in your life, but I am here today to tell you guys that that just is not true. Forgiveness does not equal weakness, plain and simple. In fact, forgiveness means that you are one of the strongest people on this earth if you can give forgiveness to those people around you that have betrayed you, those people that have lied to you, those people that have done you dirty, those people that have backstabbed you, those people that have hurt you so much. If you can forgive someone in your life like that, that takes a secure, strong person to look right in the face of hurt like that and still come to the point of looking back at that person when it is all said and done and say, “I forgive you.”
So I guess the main point I want to make today is that you are not weak when you forgive. Forgiveness is the very thing that gives you strength. So get out there and find it in your heart to forgive the people in your life that have hurt you.
It all starts with you.
