I want to start off by saying something that might seem insensitive -- your pain is not special. You are not feeling something that no one has ever gone through before. Other people, including me, have been depressed, heartbroken, or completely lost. Let me be clear, though -- that's not a bad thing. Take comfort in the fact that others have been through the same things you're feeling right now because that means that other people have made it through those feelings. That means you can make it through as well.

There is another side to all of this grief, because people have made it there and you will too. You just have to keep the faith. When things get hard, it's easy to believe that you will always feel this depressed. You feel like this time is different, and maybe this time you're not coming back from the darkness, but that is just not true. You have to remember all of the times you have made it through before. Remember what you have gone through, and be impressed with how much you have overcome to get you to where you are today. You should be proud of yourself for where you are at.

Life has a whole lot of struggle, and some of it seems way too hard to bear. Just the fact that you have made it as far as you have means that you have something inside of you that doesn't just quit when things get hard or when all feels lost. You're a fighter, man. Don't forget that. You've got to keep the faith in yourself to keep fighting past these hard times. This is not the end of your story. A lot of people worry too much about happiness that they can't control. Happiness is not going to just show up because you're tired of being sad. You have to be proactive enough to find your joy. Don't just wallow until you feel better, because that time may never come if that's your strategy.

Remember the fighter in you, and start to take control back from your pain. Many times we don't feel happy because we're dependent on the way things are to make us happy. Sometimes you have to change the way things are because you're living in an unhealthy way. First off, stop comparing yourself to others. That will never make you happy. The grass will always seem greener on the other side, I can promise you that. I guarantee you it's not. Those same people you're comparing your life to probably also struggle with depression or low self-esteem. I guarantee you that they struggle with pain because that's universal. The second thing is this -- let go of the things you have been holding onto that you know are weighing you down. Whether it's a person, a job, or just a state of mind. Stop checking up on your ex on Facebook. Stop wondering about the what ifs. Start focusing on you, and being kind to you. Stop doing what you know is holding you back.

It all starts with you.