I am going to say that again because I think it is so important to remember: Staying in the pain will not help you heal. I know a lot of us know that but we do not actually put in the work to get out of the pain like we should. I say the phrase "it all starts with you" a lot because I believe that personal responsibility is the key to transforming your life for the better. Taking responsibility for where you are in your life is crucial for moving forward from wherever it is that you are. Now, I am not saying that it is your fault that you are in a crappy situation because it is very possible that you are the victim of bad circumstances that put you where you are. Life can be hard and unforgiving sometimes. I definitely understand that. I am not saying that it is your fault that you are where you are, but it is your fault if you choose to stay there.

Sometimes life will put you in painful situations and it takes time to grieve and heal from that so I am certainly not saying that being sad or grieving is wrong or irresponsible. In fact, I think that grieving is very important and being able to feel an emotion to get through it is very important. Do not just stuff your feelings down because you feel that you can't be sad about a bad situation or circumstance. What I am saying is that if you ever want to move forward and get past the pain that you find yourself in then you have to start taking responsibility to make that change. There is no cavalry coming. Nobody is coming to save you. It is you against the world and if you want to have a shot at healing from the pain then you cannot stay in it forever. You have got to find a way to step out of the pain and find some positive in your life to cling to.

There will always be times when you will feel down but in the face of that it is important to continue putting yourself out there and not shying away from everyday life because you feel like nothing will every be the same again. Now, hear me closely and know that I am not trying to imply that I am all knowing about issues that we go through or that I somehow completely understand your situation, because I don't. Your situation is yours and it is unique to you so I cannot speak to it specifically, but what I can tell you is this: No matter how bad things seem right now, they will get better. I promise. You just have to make sure you are making a serious effort to put things back together. You have to make sure that you are continuing to work hard to be the best version of yourself and I promise that things will start looking up.

It all starts with you.